Hey, Francis! I got somebody I'd like you to meet.

Image: The Mirror

Some people appear to getting their panties in a wad over the pope laying hands on some guy and praying. They're saying he performed an exorcism on the guy right there in line at St. Peter's Square.

Here's the video:

[Source: YouTube]

Now, it looks to me like he did exactly what I said in the opening sentence: he laid hands on a fellow and offered a prayer. Heck, I've seen Baptists do that, so I'm certainly not surprised when the Bishop of Rome does it.

But, some folks are going all gaga over it, calling it an exorcism. And, heck, maybe it was.

If it was, and Pope Francis can do that (and I'm not doubting it), I wonder if maybe he'll do it again sometime.

I suggest his next visit to Washington, DC, would be a great time. So, in case the head of the Roman Catholic Church is reading this, here's what to do:

• From Reagan National, have the driver take the George Washington Parkway to I-395 North.
• Take the US-1 exit, merging onto US-1/14th Street.
• Left on Madison.
• Right on 15th NW.
• Left onto E Street/Pennsylvania Avenue (you'll need to show ID, it's restricted).
• Take the first right.
• Ask for Barack.

I wish you much success!

Shocked!

Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images

I was shocked -- Shocked! -- to learn that the chairman of the Democrat party in Georgia, an attorney named Mike Belon, is being disciplined by the State Bar.

Now, it's only a Review Board Reprimand, which means no fine or suspension. I'm not sure if it even comes with a "don't do that again." What did he do? Well, according to WAOK radio:

The client had claimed Berlon failed to file paperwork as requested and paid an investigator without permission.

Berlon tells The Associated Press he takes responsibility for the miscommunication with the client on legal strategy.

So, a Democrat is supposed to be working for someone, but has no idea what the client wants, and it ends up costing the client more?

Heck, he's presidential material. If you consider Obama presidential.

Leash law

Was doing laundry Sunday. Of course, that meant a trip to the laundromat, which meant ... Laundromat People.

Now, I fully realize that I'm now one of the Laundromat People, but that just makes me more qualified than others to comment on them.

Let me set the stage. The TV is on De Pelicula, and it's showing a movie featuring masked Mexican wrestlers, girls in short shorts, and double-south-of-the-border rejects from The Final Sacrifice -- complete with hockey hair.

Then, there's the the kid on a leash running around. Little girl, three years old maybe, that was there with two women (possibly a mother and grandmother, but not sure). This isn't a debate about putting kids on a leash. I'll let Erick Erickson deal with that. No, I want to use the kid to make a point.

Now, if you weren't paying attention, let me say the key part of this again: there's a kid on a leash running around.

Think about that. If she's on a leash, how is she running around? No, she's not dragging the leash behind her. There's a hand firmly attached to the leash.

No, she's not leading the mother around. She's carrying her own leash.

And that's the problem with the government. We know it needs a leash, but we let it carry its own leash. And, it runs wild.

So, what do we do about it? The government, I mean. Do we grab the leash and hope it doesn't bite us? (Think: IRS.)

Do we try to cage it?

What do we do about it? 'Cause I got the feeling it's sizing us up for something a little more restrictive than a leash.

Here's your sign

KRQE-TV/YouTube Screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CN

Read an article earlier this month about a worker at an Intel plant that sued over a "kick me" sign others placed on his back. The lawsuit wasn't just because of the sign, but because people at work actually kicked him. You can go read about it if you want.

The thing is, it gave me an idea. What if somebody put a sign on Obama's back?

Now, I don't know if he'd sue, but I'd be willing to take that chance. But would you?

If you had the chance to put a sign on Obama's back, would you? And, if so, what would it say?

1 Corinthians 13

Son, you're now married. Whether you realize it or not, your world has changed.

Yes, this is the dreaded "Dad's giving me advice and I didn't ask for any" situation that arises ... well, all the time. It's kinda what I do.

I'm gonna suggest you go read 1 Corinthians 13. Almost any translation will do. If you use the King James Version, it'll say "charity," but that word from 1611 would today be rendered as "love." Anyway, go read 1 Corinthians 13.

Now, why would someone with my marriage track record be someone you'd listen to? Maybe I'm not someone you need to listen to. Then, again, maybe I am. Hear me out and decide.

Go read 1 Corinthians 13. Yes, that's the third time I've said that. Maybe I think it's important. And maybe you need to go see why I think it's important. So go read it.

Now, about the wedding. It was beautiful. Yes, the rain kinda made things wet and sloppy and just plain rotten at times, but that was nothing but stuff around the wedding. The wedding itself was beautiful. Your vows to each other brought tears to my eyes. Everybody was looking at the two of you, so I got away with it.

Remember when it was all stressing you out, and in the elevator, when it was just you and me, I said to let those that are wanting to do their stuff do their stuff? I wasn't telling you anything you didn't already know; you were already doing that. But, I said it anyway, to reinforce what you were doing. You were doing the right thing for the circumstances, and I wanted you to know that.

See? You already know what to do. You're a grown man. Now, you're a grown married man. I'll be offering advice, but, like the "let 'em do their stuff" advice, it'll often be things you already know. When I do that, I'm trying to reinforce what you know. I can't teach you much anything new, except by example, and then, it's often examples of what not to do.

Kinda like, "Huh. Look what Dad did. Look where it got him. I need to not do that." So, yeah, I can be of some use, even if it's an example of what not to do.

But, I also have some good advice on things to do. Like what I mentioned earlier: go read 1 Corinthians 13.

Oh, and this next bit isn't easy, but it's necessary: After you've read it, go live it.

Netflix and Sarah Palin

Maybe I'm just a humorless jerk, but I didn't find this funny:

#SarahPalinFilms "Iron Sky" nflx.it/11AZvLR twitter.com/netflix/status…
— Netflix US (@netflix) May 1, 2013

You see, the lefties had started a Twitter hashtag #SarahPalinFilms trashing the former governor and GOP vice presidential nominee. Netflix saw fit to join in the Sarah-bashing.

Then, when asked about it, lied. So that's two strikes. But, the first is enough for me.

Now, had they done such a thing with Barack Obama also, then there'd be the chance that Netflix was ragging on both sides of the political spectrum. But, no. They only poke fun at the right. So, this right wing nutcase isn't sharing any more of his money with Netflix. After all these years, I've canceled my Netflix account:

I'll be able to find enough to watch without them. It's a shame, though. I've been a customer a long time.

Too bad they don't respect their customers. At least, their right-wing customers.

The break-up

I'm not sure I expected this day would come, but it has. And break-ups, despite their necessity, are never easy.

I fell in love at first sight. We were so compatible, it seemed. We went many places together, and I found the whole relationship to be very satisfying.

Oh, sure, there were the occasional problems. Many times, it was because when the situation required my input, I would totally screw it up. But, on those situations, I'd realize my mistake and make it right.

However, the misleading things from the other in the relationship began to gnaw at me. And, one day, I had simply had enough. I knew a break-up was inevitable.

And, being a guy, I did what any guy would do: I began looking for ... well, let's just say I wasn't entirely faithful.

Now, I'm moving on. The relationship is over and I've severed ties.

Despite everything, I'm not bitter, and I truly believe I would be welcome back. But, I really don't think it'll happen.

So, Waze, you were a pretty good GPS for my iPhone, but I'm now with Google Maps. Still, I truly do wish you the best.

These are not the doctors you're looking for

Calling Dr. Killbot

Robots have been in the news lately. There's a robot that's been operating on people, and killing some of them.

I know. You're thinking that the Three Laws won't let that happen. Well, guess what? The Three Laws are just fiction. Killer medical robots are real.

There's an AP report out of Chicago that tells of one busy robot:

... a million-dollar, multi-armed robot named da Vinci, used in nearly 400,000 surgeries nationwide last year ...

Did you know that? Some multi-armed robot has been doing surgery all across the country, at the rate of over 1,000 a day.

And, if that's not enough, it's a killer robot:

... the high-tech helper is under scrutiny over reports of problems, including several deaths that may be linked with it ...

If I had told you when Congress was getting ready to pass Obamacare that in 2013, we'd have killer robots operating on people, you'd've said I was a right-wing nutcase.

Yeah, well, the Associated Press backs me up. We got killer robots playing doctor. And not in the fun way.

You thought all you had to look out for was drones. But now you have to be wary of multi-armed killer medical robots.

If I were you, I'd play it safe and avoid all multi-armed robots. For a while, at least.

Trippin'

Photo: Ramon Espinosa/AP

Seems some folks are getting their panties in a wad over Mr. & Mrs. Shawn Corey Carter's trip to Cuba. You may know the Carters as Beyoncé and Jay-Z. Or, you may not.

Mrs. Carter is the one called Beyoncé, in case you aren't familiar. She's a singer or something. She also acts. You may have seen her in the Austin Powers movie Goldmember where she played Tamara Dobson.

Mr. Carter is a singer and part owner of the Brooklyn Nets, a former ABA team.

Anyway, now that you know who they are, they're catching a lot of grief over their trip to Cuba. They went for their fifth wedding anniversary.

"So, where do you want to go for our anniversary, Sweetheart?"

"Well, I've always dreamed of walking the streets of a city where there are chickens running around loose."

"How about Cuba? Lots of places like that down there."

"Perfect!"

Okay, maybe that's not how it went, but then again, maybe it was. You don't know.

A couple of Florida Congressmen (okay, a Congressman and a Congresswoman) are all up in arms over it, according to the Washington Post.

Personally, I don't have a problem with their trip to Cuba. I'm all in favor of them going there. I'm even more supportive of them staying there.

Simple.TV vs TiVo

In my quest to find the best cable-cutting setup, I'm looking at something called Simple.TV (that's not just its name, it's its Website).

Simple.TV is a DVR. Only, it doesn't connect to your TV. Which sounds kinda odd. But, here's how it works.

The idea is to connect the Simple.TV box to your input (cable, or, in my case, antenna). Note that it only works with unencrypted (ClearQAM) digital channels. That means if your cable provider is sending analog signals (some still do), then it won't work. It also won't work on encrypted channels (Comedy Central, AMC, HBO, etc.). But, since I cut cable and am using an over-the-air (OTA) antenna, I'm good.

You need a hard drive for storage. They don't include any onboard storage, but the device will work with most USB external drives. But, you gotta buy that extra.

The Simple.TV box also has to be connected to your network via ethernet port. That is, wired. As in not wireless. Which means you either need to have a cable/antenna connection near your router, a good network extender, or a really long LAN cable.

The final thing is, you need a Roku box.

Remember when I said that it doesn't connect to your TV, which is kinda odd? Well, they get around it by using Roku. That also means that a single Simple.TV box will support up to 5 TVs. Most DVRs are for a single TV, so that's a nice feature.

So, how does it work? It works okay, but it's got some bugs.

Here's the good: price.

Compared to TiVo, it's cheaper. A lot cheaper. Both a Simple.TV box and a TiVo Premier box run $149. The Simple.TV setup requires a hard drive (around $69), so that makes the initial cost more. But, it's the cost of the service that makes the savings of Simple.TV over TiVo.

A year of Simple.TV service is $49. TiVo is $14.99/month, which works out to $179.88/year. And there's your savings.

Now, here's the bad: it's not as polished as TiVo. In fact, it's barely polished at all. The TiVo interface is vastly superior. Vastly. Did I say "vastly?" Well, I will: vastly.

Using the TV interface (via Roku) to schedule a recording is a pain. The selections say "Beta" and they mean it. It's not ready for prime time. You can view what's currently playing, and what's coming up next, and ... that's it. There's a "Browse Upcoming" area that's not totally useless, but with a little work, could be.

The best way to schedule recordings is via the Website. Even then, there are some simple things that Simple.TV didn't think about. For example, you can't rearrange the priority of the shows. TiVo makes that fairly easy to do. Simple.TV? Not so much.

I won't sit here and trash Simple.TV, but I will say that it's inferior to TiVo in many respects.

What would make Simple.TV better? Multiple tuners, for one. Or, at least a way to seamlessly link two devices to one account. But, that's a nice to have. They need to fix the other stuff first.

Like what? Well, they should improve the interface. I'd like to be able to easily find and schedule shows. You can't do that via the interface. Sure, the Website is an option, but that's not simple. As in Simple.TV.

They also need to fix the Website. If you want to change the recording options for a program, the screen tells you to go to the Website to do that. Only, that page doesn't exist. And, looking around the pages that do exist, there's no readily apparent way to alter the recording options on a show.

I suggest someone at Simple.TV pony up and buy a TiVo. Use it. See how it's done. Look at the functionality TiVo offers in finding and recording shows via the interface. You don't have to clone TiVo, but you do need to look at what they offer, and find a way of offering the same functionality. Or, at least, make your functionality easier to use. You know, simple.

As you can tell, I'm a fan of TiVo. But, it's expensive. Don't get me wrong; it's a great service. But I wish there were cheaper alternatives.

Simple.TV shows a lot of promise, but they haven't yet delivered on them. I haven't given up hope. I'm not yet ready to recommend it, but I haven't sent mine to the cornfield yet.